I know I look crap
I bumped into an ex-boyfriend yesterday… he’s contracting at the company I work at and I chatted to him in the queue for lunch in the canteen. I met him at my matric dance (like a prom), he was a friend’s partner (don’t ask J ). We went out just after I left school for a few months, and I haven’t seen him in about 5 years, maybe longer.
In fact, thinking about it, our relationship happened almost 19 years ago (the end of 1989) How frightening is that? Oh boy, I suddenly feel very old.
Anyway, he was saying that I looked exactly the same, I haven’t changed a bit. Well, he hasn’t really either, apart from losing a bit of weight.
Now I can’t decide whether I’m happy or sad about that fact. The more I think about it the sadder I get.
In one way, it’s brilliant that he thinks that I haven’t aged in 20 odd years.
However, no change? Not good. I know my hair looks crap at the moment… I’m trying to grow it and it’s basically looking like rats tails. I can’t straighten it and it’s not curly enough to be called curly. It’s just blah!
As for my skin, I have a zit in the middle of my forehead! I haven’t had a zit like this in ages… I think I need to change my skin creams again actually I’m starting to react to the make I’m using.
And lets not go to the bags under my eyes. I had a meeting with OD today (the resident psychologists in the company who help with team dynamics), and she told me that I looked tired.
I know I look tired. I feel tired. All the time. I’m always on edge, watching what I say here and at home in case I tip the balance. I’m an outsider looking in at the moment with all aspects of my life. But more about that when I don’t start crying at the thought of getting it all out.
So, what should I change? Cut my hair short again? Bearing my age in mind, this is probably the last time I’ll get away with growing it. And then again, I’ve had my hair short for so long, that I’m bored with it, and even that is not a change.
Oh crap I feel crap!
Anyway, I’m outta here, I’m going to the funeral now.
PS. that makes 3 ex-boyfriends now working in this building! This world is too small sometimes 
((((HUGS)))
Sounds like your life is spinning out of your control. Treat yourself to a day at a spa where all you have to do is lie still and “catch your breath”.
I always look my best on days I don’t go anywhere. My hair sits right, skin is clear yada yada yada.
Meeting up with an old boyfriend would send anyone into a tailspin. Let alone with what you are dealing with babe.
We all feel like that from time to time. I’m also growing my hair and have a huge zit. To add insult to injury, I’m fat and infertile… I sure as hell hope I don’t run into any old boyfriends! They’d thank their lucky stars that they escaped this!
Hey doll – don’t feel alone! I am getting acne at my age! Doctor says all hormonal – Makes me feel so much better…not!!! I cringe at seeing anyone from my past – look horrid these days! Tired of being told I “look tired” all the time – even after 8 hrs of sleep?!! Anyway, just want you to know you are not alone.
Good news – found some amazing vitamins that are helping – so enjoying them while they work. Called “StaminoGro”. Also the 3 boys are still at the age where mom is the most beautiful women on earth – so I’m milking that for all it’s worth!!!
And by the way – YOU are a beautiful woman, ain’t nothing gonna change that! Have a fab day – and may your zit see it’s end VERY soon
sheesh… 3 exes in one place!?!
i’d have run screaming by now!!!
and you know dudes don’t notice changes- if they recognise you its a bonus… apart from them beingf an ex i mean…
ugh, never mind! i’m confusing myself here!
Hey Jeanette!!!
I would also be more concerned about the 3 exs – I dont have NICE exs than the zits and hair!!
I think its a compliment you look the same tho
)
Maybe a make over will make you feel a little better?